modification of alimony

[fltireman]

My divorce started in 2004,and after 5 judges ended in 2007, she got everything, i got the shaft. My final decree states that up[on sucessful cohabitation, alimony can be abated ,or modified. Since she lived with her boyfriend from aug,07 until jan ,08,and then after I filed for modification of alimony, her attorney advised her to move out,does this still count?
I have been laid off twice this year thru no fault of my own,and now making considerably lees than when the original orders were drawn up, I am trying to get this modified, filed in feb,08, hearing with Magistrate Dec'08, can I also get back the funds she wrongfully obtained, her attorney is faxing IDo paperwork to all my new employers, within days of my getting a new job, can she do that?Is not the Ido specific to the original employer?. I filed for emergency modification of alimony, because I cannot afford my bills, my power and cable have been shut off and I cannot afford my prescriptions, yet the judge ruled it was not " an emergency', then what is? She takes lavish vacations, I cannot afford to live,what help, do you suggest?

[Attorney Howard Iken]

What her attorney advised is clever but may not necessarily work. If she suddenly made a change to avoid consequences - that does not count. But you need to prove her cohabitation pattern prior to the change.

You must show more than cohabitation - that is not enough in itself.

You must also prove some things like:

Co-mingling of bank accounts
Joint names on deeds
Joint names on titles
Jointly paid household expenses.

On the IDO - technically they can do what they are doing. You need to schedule a hearing to Abate the alimony and IDO. This is technically not an emergency but you can still get it on the hearing calendar. This would be easier for you if you had an attorney.

I realize none of this sounds easy if you are self-represented - but that is the way things are in the court system.

Attorney Howard Iken
Family Law Attorneys