Resources For Kids Facing Divorce was last modified: May 27th, 2016 by Howard Iken

Resources For Kids Facing Divorce


Divorce is a difficult situation for every member of a family. Children of divorced parents must deal with a lot of adjustments in their lives. For instance, a kid may have to move to a different home or attend a different school in order to live with a particular parent. In short, major changes take place in the life of a kid whose parents get divorced.

Understanding Divorce

Trying to understand divorce is a frustrating thing for many kids. A divorce may take place if a married couple grows apart or just can’t seem to solve their differences. Most kids whose parents get divorced start off with a lot of questions. For example, a kid may be under the impression that he or she is somehow to blame for the breakup. A kid may also wonder if anything can be done to bring his or her parents back together. It’s very important for kids to share these questions and feelings with their parents. Whether parents are married or divorced, they are still concerned with their kid’s well-being.

It’s Not Your Fault

So many times a kid blames him or herself for the parents’ breakup. Many kids may think that if they performed better in school or behaved better at home, their parents wouldn’t have gotten divorced. Kids must always remember that they are not to blame for their parents’ divorce. Parents get divorced for reasons that involve one another and not the children. Any kid who blames him or herself for a divorce should certainly share those feelings with both mom and dad.

Impact on School and Grades

Not surprisingly, it’s hard for a kid to focus on schoolwork and grades when his or her family is dealing with a divorce. It’s helpful for kids coping with divorce to talk their feelings over with their parents, a close friend, or perhaps a counselor or a teacher. Letting a teacher know about the situation may help them to understand why a student’s grades are slipping. In fact, support and encouragement offered by teachers may go a long way to help a kid through a tough time.

Sibling Relationships

Divorce can affect a kid’s relationships with brothers and sisters. After all, everyone reacts to divorce in his or her own way. For example, one brother may feel angry and frustrated over the situation. Alternatively, a sister may want to talk about the divorce with her siblings and ask a lot of questions. In many cases, arguments occur between siblings who are coping with a divorce situation.

Parent Relationships

When a kid’s parents get divorced, he or she has to readjust to a new life. A kid may be angry with one parent and blame him or her for the situation. A parent may have to move away causing a kid to feel insecure. A young person must keep in mind that everyone is readjusting to the new situation. Furthermore, it’s essential for kids to remember that they are still loved, just as much as ever, by their parents.

Adjusting to a New Home

New living conditions are generally a part of divorce. Whether it’s a kid moving to a new place or visiting a parent in a new home, there are definite changes. A kid can do a few simple things to feel at home in the places of both parents. For instance, keeping some personal items such as books, stuffed animals, or CDs in both places will help make the atmosphere more comfortable.

Adjusting to Splitting Time between Parents

A divorce sometimes means that a kid spends a certain amount of time living in the houses of both parents. For example, a kid could spend a few weeks of winter vacation with one parent and the remainder of the school year with the other. In order to adjust to this division of time, a kid might want to plan fun activities to share with each parent. Ultimately, kids must remember to focus on making the most of their time with each parent.

Finding Support

Naturally, most kids have many questions when it comes to divorce. A kid may want to discuss the situation with a close friend whose parents who are divorced. The friend might have some helpful insights to share. A school counselor can also help answer a kid’s questions about divorce or just be there to listen. It’s very important for kids whose parents are getting a divorce to talk about the things that are troubling them. Kids should never be embarrassed about seeking help whenever they need it.

At first, a divorce can seem like an overwhelming situation to a kid. However, with the help of parents, friends, as well as loved ones a kid can move forward with his or her life.

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I hired Howard Iken as my attorney to handle my divorce case. Not only did he secure a win for me in the eventual divorce trial, he was also successful in having the post divorce trial petitions (4) filed by my ex-husband dismissed. Mr. Iken is very professional and adept at developing strategies that are favorable to his clients. He is organized, thorough, creative and more than willing to go the extra mile. I would highly recommend Mr. Iken’s law firm to anyone seeking legal services.

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Having worked as an investigator and later in my career as a counselor for divorces gave me plenty of exposure to Lawyers. Therefore, I had a lot of resistance and fears of working with any lawyer. Therefore, I did thorough research and found Howard Iken. I must say that I have nothing but appreciation for him. His knowledge, expertise, and support are priceless. First of all he does not sell you a dream, in other words he is upfront and honest at all times. He has also been extremely assertive and a big advocate for my daughter and my rights as a father in the court room. Outside of the court room he has been extremely supportive, accessible, and informative at all times. In fact many times I would send him an email with a question and would be surprised to receive a response right away. After my past experiences working in the system he has shown me that there are excellent lawyers that truly are there for their client’s best interest.

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